Nothing in particular

It's been quite awhile since I posted anything the reason being that I have a difficult time sticking to anything! My weight continues to be an issue. As a matter of fact I have gained almost all I've lost since I started Weight Watchers. I keep going and I keep trying to get back on track. I know that if I got back to exercising regularly it would make a world of difference. I would feel better both physically and emotionally but I won't do it! Well I better got on the stick or my health and well being will go done the tubes. OK enough whining and  self-flagellation. Hopefully next time I post it will be more positive!

New Puppy

I have clearly lost my mind! I've decided to chalk it up to menopause! Her name is Maddie and she is 8 weeks old. I feel like a new mother getting up in the middle of the night or early morning to feed her or take her outside. She is adorable but I hope that I don't end up regretting this. I swore I would never have a dog again. Too much work, can't go away without making arrangements etc. I thought I would just have cats they are self-sufficient and we can leave for the weekend without any hassle. A friend of mine got a new dog and that started me thinking about getting a dog. A dog not a puppy! but when I started looking I found Maddie and couldn't resist.

5K Day

Walked in a 5K today to benefit PDSA (Platelet Disorder Support Association). A friend of mine had a son die recently from a platelet disorder. Really makes you appreciate the health and well-being of your own family. I also am doing"OK" with my eating. I haven't been perfect but close. Although I have been steadily regaining weight today was the first time I looked at myself in the mirror and actually noticed the gain and how big I looked. I have to turn this around and quick otherwise I will not have any clothes to wear when school starts again in September. Also went to St.Paul's this morning. I really am not happy with the service but I have a lot of history with the church and I still love being in the choir. It's just that some people there still make me so angry. I continue to have a difficult time forgiving and forgetting. As a christian I know that is what I should do but it hasn't happened yet and truly there are some people I may never really forgive and certainly not forget.

Weight

Went to Weight Watchers and was up again 3.2lbs. I have been gaining steadily and am having trouble getting back on track. Sometimes I choose to blame it on the fact that I am 50 and going through menopause but really who am I kidding! It might actually have something to do with all the crap I am eating duh!! I am so tired of most of my thoughts being consumed with thinking about food. What to eat, what not to eat, what am I going to eat next?, why am I eating this? I could go on forever in this vein. I have always said that I just want to think normally about food. I don't want to obsess about it anymore. Well that's probably not going to happen any time soon so I am going to try using my thoughts for good instead of evil. A friend of mine suggested that when I want to have something I shouldn't I need to stop and ask myself if this is going to help me reach my goal and is it worth having it. Sometimes the answer may be a resounding "YES" and that's ok as long as its not a yes all the time. Most often heck always I view the weekends as a free for all food wise.  This obviously is not working so I am going to try to commit to working the plan even on the weekends or should I say especially on the weekends. Here's hoping that today I am successful!

New to Blogging

    I have tried journaling many times over the years without much success. I have some friends who blog and have read several different blogs and thought I might give it a try. I don't expect that anyone else will find my "blogging" very interesting and that's fine because really I feel this is an outlet for me!
    So although the title of this blog is my life at 50 that's kind of a misnomer. I just couldn't come up with a clever title!